The Genesis of Kasey Capable

 

In March 2022, I took the brave step of leaving the job landscape I had known to embark full-time in the gig economy.  It was a difficult decision and one fraught with worry. I was financially secure in my previous career but often depressed, exhausted, overlooked, angry, and hopeless. What I was more worried about, however, was continuing to cap my creative potential enmeshed in the protocol, set hours, and preset to-do lists. 

It was a difficult decision.  Yet, if you look at the list above, it was also a no-brainer if I was going to live. Workaholism continues to be one of my uphill climbs, or the ability to stop climbing and enjoy the landscape. It has had enormous pay-offs financially, physically, and emotionally.  The ability to set my schedule has mainly enhanced my relationships (when I'm not obsessed with my work). My toolbox for self-care is an essential tote.  I must carry it more than any other. 

 I’m a new entrepreneur.  Putting efficient systems in place is often overwhelming.  Start-up costs are much more than I had imagined.  Navigating the ebb and flow of work is an endeavor I continue to dare to muster.  The good times are lucrative, exhilarating, and exhausting.  The slow times can be fraught with worry and wonder.   Two days after I signed up for my LLC, my Instagram identity was stolen, and my most lucrative client became upset with me.  I asked myself, did I make the right decision? I mended fences with the upset client.  The problem necessitated a more profound discussion about familial relationships, the future, and my dedication to her dogs.  The next day, I wrote something on Facebook that showcased my emotional profundity and ability to pause and reflect.  So be it if Instagram was gone and someone had stolen my identity.  My client told me the Instagram thing happened to one of her co-workers.   I told her how I threw my phone down her lawn, and her dogs chased after it.  I laughed.  She understood my frustration.

  I cried.  I breathed.  I let go.  My friends are more intelligent than falling for this hacker’s scam.  It was an opportunity to reconnect with so many people I had allowed to fall through the cracks.  They want to punch this person in the face as much as I do.  My network, I realized, is solid and sturdy, like me, and we, yes, we, will get through this.  I don’t want to get too upset or too stressed anyways.  I am a dog-sitter, and dogs sense vibes.  I spend money soothing myself.  I find it incredibly necessary. 

I fancy myself a business owner now.  Often, the thought of fraud greets me at my doorstep.  I think of Terrie Hummel, a dog expert in my book, and I remember how she continues to book with me. I have begun to educate myself like her.  I improve with each visit.  I think of my first dog, Carter, our years-long relationship, and the fact that I was his person’s first choice.  I think of Tracy Besselman and how intimidated I am by their home and success, but more, I think of my many visits there and how much she and her dogs enjoy my stays.  On my last visit, I sent their son a journal that could enhance his hockey game.  My confidence is showing signs of improving!  

The tide comes back in. I feel my breath. My shoulders relax. My ability to remain calm under pressure is life-giving.   It has helped me walk my grandmother through the destruction of her home.  It will help me as we walk my father, a best friend to both of us, to his final resting place. I have a choice to make with each action.  Where can I be the storm, and where can be the eye? If I’m honest, I can be the eye of the storm as much as I can be the storm itself.  It’s as important for me to rock a dance floor occasionally as it is to teach yoga and lead worship service.  There must be occasions where I’m not so damn responsible, and I allow myself to let go!  I’m great in people’s homes and with their dogs.  On each visit, I aim to enhance the efficiency of homes and the owner's life with their pet.  It’s minor improvements in activities we do multiple times daily that can have a powerful impact on improving health and wellness.

I long for the slow times and tell myself vehemently that I will use this time more efficiently.  I dream about running with the bulls in Europe, sun-kissed beaches in Costa Rica, and reuniting with a lover in San Francisco.  Instead of my occasional bouts of exhaustion, I want to plan vacations.   I learn to extend grace to myself.  I review my self-care toolbox- hiking and taking pictures, sleeping more than I prefer, allowing myself to gain weight, being soothed by my cooking, writing letters to God, and completely freaking out over the excitement of March Madness!  I write more.  I take small action steps towards my goals.

I endure the break-up of a cherished relationship. It’s so challenging.  I lean into my friends and family and set aside time to cry.  I don’t have to pick up the pieces immediately and don’t want to.  I meet someone else on my travels and put this on the back burner.  If I don’t take time to heal, the same thing will happen again. I realize I have become marriage material and want and deserve so much better next time.    

  I make mistakes.  I accept that I can’t win all of the time and that a difficult life lesson is that I’m not suitable for everyone.  I can’t score after writing every quote and sometimes relationships don’t work out.  I’m terrible at managing my busy schedule, but I’m getting better.   I carry my growth.  Every day I make better and more efficient systems.  I network.  I share my findings with others.  I ask for help.  Oh baby, do I need it?  I need it in ways I hadn’t imagined.  

Success is a two-headed monster.  On the one side, my bank account loves it.  On the other, I feel like a terrible fraud!  When someone tells me they love my yoga class, some of me want to ask them who paid them to say that as much as there are parts of me that know it, know it absolutely that I am gifted.  When one of my dogsitting clients tells me how special I am, I want to run to the nearest intersection and throw myself into traffic as much as there are parts of me that know I’m gifted with animals and that their words are precisely what I have been longing to hear.  When I am asked to work at a private party held for Josh Shapiro, I think immediately about what I might wear and how much I want to turn the job down instantly.  

Three years ago, professionals told me I wasn’t fit to work after a terrible bout with anxiety and a stay at a mental hospital.  That is all the evidence I need to scream fraud in my face on certain days.  There are also times in my life, many of them when I have crossed unimaginable finish lines.  I’m only a 5’1” tall female and a helluva basketball player.  My first triathlon found me jumping into the open ocean, biking a bazillion miles, and then running through the sand.  This is despite zero triathlon experience, never having swam competitively, and never owning a bicycle that cost more than $100.  I imagine the many finish lines:  graduating cum laude while working full-time, assisting my grandmother for a lifetime, and coming out as someone who didn't give two hoots whether or not I ever married a man.  I recall playing piano in the mental hospital and reading the bible daily to a woman who could barely see and was incontinent due to her abusive relationship.  I blow away that invisible and powerful monster called fraud, and you aren’t worthy of working ever again. I play on!  Another day dawns.  I have discovered the purpose and secret of mental wellness. For me, it's helping others.  

Kasey Capable will not engage in petty disagreements. We will accentuate the positive and move on.  The millions of dollars my mentors saw as pre-destined for this woman of words is a matter of time.  It’s exhilarating, mostly.  It hinges upon that same young woman who dribbled her basketball to the courts daily, believing that consistent practice would put her ahead of the competition.  She dribbled in the rain.  She didn’t make excuses about her broken home or lack of finances.  She just simply believed.  Young Kasey was the eye of the storm at home and the storm itself on the basketball court.  I remember her now in her 5’1” of power; I remember her here despite so many failures.  I remember I have become resilient.  The disappointments in my past were just blocked shots, and I have gained incredible endurance in everyday practice.  I have learned to run and even dance in the rain.  I don’t just accept challenges; I thrive in them.  I don’t see the competition as taller.  For me, I wonder who the competition is.  I’m finding incredible partners along the way.   

With this writing, I announce the proud enterprise of Kasey Capable: pet sitter, yoga teacher, swim coach, published writer, personal chef, future Airbnb owner, future lay minister, and so much more!  Let us thrive together!